I recently went to the BlogHer Food conference in Seattle where I realized a few thing about food bloggers that I may or may not have know before. I’ve entitled this list, “You know you’re a food blogger if…”
1. You are positively giddy when you see ramps at the farmer’s market.
2. You know that when I say “ramps” I am not talking about making the farmer’s market wheelchair accessible.
3. You’ve made kale chips. And there is a recipe for it on your blog.
4. You are “over” a specialty ingredient like black garlic, even though the majority of the population doesn’t even know what it is.
5. You’ve had a conversation with another food blogger that goes something like this:
Other food blogger: “I just don’t understand why people would spend money on _____ when it’s SOOOO easy to make at home and way cheaper!” (fill in the blank with “tomato sauce” “granola” “pickles” “chicken stock” “their own wedding cake” or whatever else they think is incredibly overpriced and ridiculously easy to make)
You: “Oh I know! It’s ridiculous! And SO much better when you make it yourself!” (however, secretly, you are ashamed because you have never made said item at home)
6. You take the same photos of the produce at the farmer’s market that you did last year, but you can’t help it. The rainbow chard is so pretty!
7. You really are confused as to why granola is so expensive at the grocery store.
8. You go shopping with your significant other, and at some point, while looking for a specific item on your grocery list, you turn to him/her and say “We need to shop at a white person grocery store.” – stolen from a Matt Armendariz tweet.
9. When dining out, no one is allowed to eat the food until you have whipped out your camera/iPhone/Android and taken a shot of it first.
10. You actually style the plate you are photographing at the restaurant first, before said photo is taken.
11. You scope out restaurant tables at lunch with proximity to windows to provide natural lighting for your photographs.
12. You own a ridiculous large number of plates with different designs on them. Not sets. Just individual plates.
13. Same with silverware, napkins and cups.
14. You actually own cloth napkins. You realize that no one ever use cloth napkins right?
15. If you’ve been food blogger for less than two years, you are super excited by the prospect of a company sending you something for free.
16. If you’ve been food blogging for over two years, you immediately become suspicious if a company offers to send something to you for free.
17. You ACTUALLY know someone who is celiac, gluten intolerant, or has a gluten allergy, as opposed to those people who say they are avoiding gluten, but will then pick the croutons off of the salad because it’s the trendy diet they are on.
18. You’ve done a “cleanse” or elimination diet before.
19. You have run out of room for your cookbooks. Yet you still buy more.
20. You eat seasonal. And local. And organic. And unprocessed. As much as possible. (unless someone offers you a slice of chocolate cake).
21. You think Pinterest is a godsend as well as the devil’s work.
22. You Tweet. You Facebook. You Instagram. You Pin. You comment. You even occasionally stumble. But you don’t really bother with Google+.
23. You aren’t quite sure what you did with your spare time before food blogging and social media took over.
24. You’ve brought a cake or pie to a party with a slice already taken out, which you had done earlier, when you photographed it.
25. Every time you see someone with a dSLR camera, you feel obligated to ask that person what type of camera they are using, and what lens they own. Then you either exclaim “Oh I have that lens!” or “I totally want that lens!” It doesn’t matter what lens they say, these are the only two appropriate answers.
26. When your significant other or kid accidentally spills something on your wooden surface that you just distressed for your photos, you start to get angry and then you look at it and think “Hmmm. That actually looks pretty good.”
27. You start to get nervous when you are down to only one pound of butter, one bag of flour, one head of garlic, or one onion.
28. You own more than five different salts, and are aghast when people just own one type – especially if it is regular iodinized table salt.
29. You get super crazy excited when you meet a famous cookbook author, chef or food blogger that you admire, and when you try to tell the story to your non-food blogging friends with a “You won’t believe who I just met!!!” intro, they give you a blank look and don’t have a clue who you are talking about.
30. You own chickens. Or you wish you owned chickens.
31. You now describing food as “bright” or “intense” and reserve the words “delicious” and “yummy” to describe articles of clothing or up-and-coming actors.
32. When you eat out and order a dish that surprises you, instead of enjoying it, you start mentally analyzing it and trying to figure out if you can reverse engineer it at home.
33. Your significant other has gotten in the habit of finishing really amusing, but slightly embarrassing story with the phrase “…and you can’t blog, tweet or facebook about this!”
34. You get tired of people asking you when you are opening up a restaurant/bakery, writing a cookbook, or getting your own TV show. It’s not that easy people. It’s really not that easy.
35. You own more than one cake stand. Actually you own more than five cake stands.
36. When you see peeling paint on the wall of a dilapidated house, instead of being sad for the owner of the house, you think to yourself “that would be make a great background texture for one of my photographs…”
37. Even though every food photographer you know has told you that “the gear doesn’t matter” you know in your heart of hearts that if you owned a Canon 5DMkIII or Nikon D800 your photos would never be rejected by Foodgawker or Tastespotting.
38. You are willing to walk very very far for an expensive donut. Or an expensive slice of pie. Or an expensive macaron. But not a cupcake. You’re totally over cupcakes.
39. You own at least 10 URLs and keep on buying more, as you think of them. Because, you never know when that URL may come in handy.
40. You desperately need to put a blog post up because it’s a Monday and “all your readers” expect you to publish a post on Monday, but you don’t have one ready, so you resort to a silly filler blog post, like “You know you’re a food blogger if…”
I know I left some out. Feel free to add your own in the comments. And join Garrett, Shauna, Justin, Ashley and me this coming Wednesday for Pie Day! Make a pie (and if you blog) write about it on your site!
This post also has been syndicated on the BlogHer network.
Zoka says
You made my day :)))) I just shared your post on facebook :)))
Lindsay @ The Live-In Kitchen says
Irvin! So so funny and spot on. This seriously made me laugh out loud, which is an honor in a world of “LOLs”.
The Suzzzz says
This made me laugh, thanks for getting my Monday off on the right food. As for #34, AMEN! My uncle owned a restaurant that I worked at and restaurants are money pits and require slavish devotion that kind of sucks the fun out of it.
A lot of these overlap with photog “you know your…when…”isms. I was a photo major fro 2 years before dropping out to travel and become a general life slacker. I’m still saving up for a good Canon MkII, but I saw this and thought you might get a kick out of the reviews and the comments on the reviews…
http://www.amazon.com/Hasselblad-H4D-60-Megapixels-Digital-40-2×53-7mm/dp/B004YG6OUQ/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1325312632&sr=8-1
Irvin says
Hilarious! I actually have the Canon 5DMKII and it’s remarkable. But whenever I take it out at conferences, people start pestering me about camera gear…
Jenn says
ha Irvin, this is great – except for the google+ part – everyone needs to be on google+!! 🙂
matthew says
Agreed. Google+ is actually a great place for food bloggers, if for no other reason than the way the service displays images.
Irvin says
You know I love Google+. It’s just the food blogging world has yet to discover it. I was super pleased that someone at BlogHer Food asked Stephanie Stiavetti about Google+ on her panel about Social Media and Traffic Building and she gave a shout out to my blog post on G+! I hope some people read up on it and have decided to join in…
DanielleJ says
I love photographing food and I love Google Plus. 🙂
Jenn says
Yeah I saw that during the tweets on her panel – hopefully more food bloggers will decide to become more involved with it 🙂
Janae @ Bring-Joy says
I’m one of those that fits your descripton to a T. I have yet to give Google+ the time of day because I just don’t see it as relevant like the others are. But I guess I could learn a thing or two…If nothing else, you’ve got me thinking about it.
Couldn’t have made a better list myself. One thing I’d add though, not necessarily to the list, but to say that I find food bloggers to be totally approachable & nice. I know some design/fashion bloggers who are not easygoing & are a bit clique-ish. I also went to BlogHer Food in Seattle & was pleasantly surprised at how nice everyone was!
Tori @ The Shiksa in the Kitchen says
I was the one who asked about Google+! Yay. 🙂
Esther says
This is hilarious! I can totally identify with a few as I am a new blogger. Some made me think…ok, that might be me in a few years time then. LOL, thanks for posting this, a refreshing and humorous tease about how our perspectives have changed because of blogdom!
Stephanie says
Hm… I’m a little worried here because I don’t do many of the things on your list. *cue existential crisis over whether or not I’m a food blogger!* …but then I realized how many cake stands I own. Maybe that makes up for it. ^^
(p.s. “to URLs” > “two URLs”)
Irvin says
Actually it’s the font. That was 10 as TEN URLs not to URLS. Two URLs is nothing!
Stephanie says
haha, my mistake! (and I don’t own 10 URLs!… gasp.)
Melissa says
Haha! #34…so true!! I was talking to a friend about my blog recently, and he wouldn’t stop with the “so when are you opening your own restaurant?” angle. I was like, NO, you REALLY don’t understand…just because I love to eat, cook, talk about & photgraph food, that in no way means I want to (or am qualified to)open a restaurant, manage a team of staff, fund the operation, etc…etc…
I also invested in what I thought was an awesome camera (I still think it is!!), but I’m stressed over people telling me what other lenses I need. There’s only so much dough I can sink into this hobby, people!!
Irvin says
Camera gear is never ending. If you have a good body, you still need a good lens. Find one lens you like, stick to it and you’re golden. You can rent lens pretty cheap to see what they are like before you invest…
Amber | Bluebonnets & Brownies says
Totally love this. Especially 21. Casey sent me. Because she’s awesome like that.
Julia says
I’m peeing my pants reading some of these.
The chicken one, yaaaaa, I wanna own some, real bad!
And #33, ya that. It’s my life. HA!
Irvin says
My partner AJ actually ends stories and anecdotes with either “and you can’t tweet that” or “Yes you have my permission to tweet that” which is kind of hilarious.
elizabeyta says
Oh, you made me laugh! But I cannot share this with my Beloved husband because I still hear the joke you tweeted that I shared with him. How do you know if two food bloggers shared a meal if a photo was not take?
christina @ ovenadventures says
ah this totally had me laughing out loud.
Michelle (What's Cooking with Kids) says
Hey, wait a minute…WE use cloth napkins. But mostly because I hate to throw away paper, and since I have kids, I do a TON of laundry anyway 🙂
Irvin says
What?!? Really? You use cloth napkins? That’s awesome. I don’t know ANYONE that uses cloth napkins. If we had a washer and dryer in our house, maybe we would too, but to have cloth napkins and have to take it all to the laundromat…that would be too much for us.
Michelle (What's Cooking with Kids) says
If we had to go to the laundromat, even my passion for the earth wouldn’t prevail! But I am happy to be the one person you know that uses cloth napkins 🙂 I probably got it from my mom…but she irons hers. Sigh.
Sabrina Modelle says
We use cloth napkins at least half the time. We also have a washer and dryer oh yeah, I’m also a closet hippie.
Penandra says
I use cloth napkins (and have a washer and dryer) — I don’t even have (or allow) paper napkins in my home. I avoid ironing cloth napkins (and table cloths) by folding them right from the dryer.
We had a friend over for ribs one time and she was afraid to wipe her hands on the cloth napkins!
Diana says
Penandra – I have cloth napkins also, but I fold them in half and then I roll them, so that I only have one crease and maybe not such a bad one at that. My brother refused to use my mom’s cloth napkins at the family dinner – I thought – no fancy schmancy restaurants for you – you wouldn’t know how to dab at your mouth. 🙂
Stacy says
We totally use cloth napkins! The few paper ones we own come from my mother-in-law (monogrammed/holiday-themed/poisoned ones) for every gift giving holiday despite rules against it since we never use them. We barely own paper towels.
kellypea says
You’d laugh if you saw my cloth napkin collection. I have a problem completely unrelated to food blogging. But they do come in handy for that! 🙂
Kimberly says
I love cloth napkins.
I do not iron them.
Most of them are antique, embroidered napkins and very pretty.
I have three little kids.
Only grown ups freak out about the napkins.
Try it. You might like it!
Michelle Tam says
I was totally stalking you at BlogHer Food but I was too dorky to come up and introduce myself. You so funny and smart. Me likey.
Irvin says
What? You should have TOTALLY come up and said hi! We’re all big dorks at the food blogging conference. I mean, come on. It’s a FOOD BLOGGING CONFERENCE. Total dork central. Next time come up and say hi! 😉
Shauna says
This. Is genius. You are a star, my friend.
Mijune says
Love your list!!! I don’t want to “promote” my own stuff on here, but I think my Sh*t Foodies Say video goes along quite well with your post! Some good overlap! http://www.followmefoodie.com/2012/01/follow-me-foodie-to-shit-foodies-say-video/
Cheers!
Mijune (Follow Me Foodie) says
Love your list!!! I don’t want to “promote” my own stuff on here, but I think my Sh*t Foodies Say video goes along quite well with your post! Some good overlap! http://www.followmefoodie.com/2012/01/follow-me-foodie-to-shit-foodies-say-video/
Cheers!
LiztheChef says
Terrific post –
Lauren @ Part Time House Wife says
SO many of these are true!!! LOL, Guess it’s official. I can truly call myself a food blogger! Especially because I have one of every color cloth napkin, 1 of each size plate and bowl in hundreds of shapes and colors
kankana says
That is one amazing list LOL LOL . I could totally connect with so many of the point .. specially No 36! Hubby thinks I am crazy .. got to show him this post!
Nancy@acommunaltable says
OMG… I think I may have just sprayed coffee all over my laptop – I was laughing so hard!! This is absolutely brilliant !!! I do wonder though, what it says about me since I was doing some of these things BEFORE I started my blog…. I think I may be in need of a 12 step program…..
sarah says
Oh, I’m laughing and cringing. #27! My husband worries about me because of that one. ‘Why are we stock piling food in the basement?’ is a frequent hot topic around here. And, it’s nice to know I’m not alone. And not crazy. 😉
Nicole Young says
AWESOME post, Irvin!
Indigo Scones says
So so so true!
Alyssa | Queen of Quinoa says
Absolutely fantastic! And so very true for many of us. It’s like looking in the mirror reading this post. Luckily there’s this great community because my non-blogging friends totally don’t understand 🙂
And I agree with Jenn on the Google+ part – everyone needs to join!!
brandi says
love this. and yes, they are ALL true.
seriously, though – WHY is granola so expensive? it. is. toasted. oats. with stuffed mixed in. i don’t get it.
Irvin says
Right? I seriously do not understand.
brandi says
it’s a good thing we all know how to make our own 🙂
Chef Dennis says
Great job Irvin!! I love the list and sadly almost everyone one of them is true for me!
Karen @ SoupAddict says
Guilty of most of these, but especially #6, both taking the photos *and* posting them … every. single. year. Step away from the heirloom tomato display … just step away. 🙂
Stephanie, The Recipe Renovator says
I was totally going to start this thread on our FB group yesterday! No kidding! Mine is: You know you’re a food blogger when you are blow-drying the inside of your Vitamix so you can make more powdered sugar.
Irvin says
That’s even more hardcore than me. I don’t own a Vitamix!
matthew says
Most of the things on this list are just as valid and applicable to food photographers (especially one married to a chef). I’ve had to ease up on photos taken at dinner, particularly with friends. Not all are as forgiving with the “wait…wait…do you mind if I catch a quick picture of your plate?”
FWIW — I think you’re missing something if you blow off Google+. The way the service handles photography, alone, is worth dabbling.
matthew says
Addendum — I don’t know HOW I missed that giant Google+ logo in the sidebar. You can strike my previous FWIW comment. Carry on. 🙂
Irvin says
I’m actually a huge advocate of Google+. So much so that I went to the Google+ Photographer Conference last month.
I put that item on there because most food bloggers AREN’T on G+, though they should be. Check out my post on Google+ for Food Bloggers for evidence of my love of G+.
matthew says
Thanks Irvin. You’ll see my name connected to a discussion about this blog piece on Google+. I apologize that I read your tongue-in-cheek comment too literally. I really wanted to attend the conference last month, but couldn’t find the time in my schedule. I will definitely read the post about Google+ for Food Bloggers, as well as other posts on your site. I just signed up for the RSS feed.
Cheers!
Barbara | Creative Culinary says
I am so not a good food blogger and I’m so OK with that. One person’s ramps are another’s weeds and speaking of weeds; I must have a thousand dollars of purslane I would like to get rid of to the first taker; before I hit it with Roundup. Is kale over yet? I hope so.
We are not all so predictable though in truth I have to admit; World Market has stopped asking me if I watch a matching set.
Irvin says
Well, the food blogging community is large and not everything I wrote above would resonate with everyone. I don’t even see myself in some of the stuff I wrote, as I composed it with my tongue planted in my cheek.
That said, I do own an awful lot of single plates. None of which are large enough to actually serve a meal on, as they are all cake & pie slice sized.
SMITH BITES says
the professor had the nerve to laugh out loud at every. single. point. in this post w/a few ‘mm-hmmmz’ tossed in for good measure . . . i have no idea what he’s talking about . . . none whatsoever . . . but i did take a photo of some beautiful looking chard yesterday . . .
FreeSpiritEater says
Great read! What an accurate and entertaining list. I can relate to many of them. =]
Sabrina Modelle says
I shouldn’t have read this while I was at work. I was laughing like a total fiend. Love it.
DB-The Foodie Stuntman says
Cute list. Yes, I’m guilty as charged…
Jillian says
The cake with a slice taken out is SO very true!!
giuseppina says
Great post Irvin !!! I’m new on blogging but I would say I’m in:too many books , cloth napkins and single plates ,cups,forks,knives etc…. and I dream of a Canon 5D .Will definetely make a pie !xxx
Sofie Dittmann @thegermanfoodie says
I’ve never laughed so hard in my life. Actually, I was over cupcakes before I even had one. Totally overrated. But I STILL want a Canon 5D Mark II. ROFL
Wendy Read - Sunchowder says
OMG, you are so brilliant!!!!! XO, Wendy
Kathy - Panini Happy says
Hilarious!! I’m pretty sure I’ve been guilty of #24 at least once (my husband is appalled, but I justify it by saying I’m “verifying it tastes good”).
Irvin says
I will say that I have come very close to do exactly that, but I have yet to actually follow through and do it, always bringing the whole cake to the party.
But one of these days I just might…
Michael @ Herbivoracious says
Color me guilty of at least 50% of those at some point in the last 5 years! Love the chard pics, so true.
anneliesz says
39. So glad you and I participated in the donut walk.
And I would add one to your list:
41. You know you’re a food blogger when you hide cake stands under your bed, in the closet behind clothes- basically anywhere you can stash them…
Irvin says
That donut walk totally inspired that one. And yes, I hide several of my cake stands behind my clothes in our wardrobe! So true.
Kristen says
Oh yes – I can relate to way to many of these than I’d like to admit!
Kerry @ Yum and Yummer says
I laughed harder and louder with each line I got through, and I hate (love?) how accurate all of this is. We food bloggers are a special kind of crazy.
Janet Rudolph @ DyingforChocolate says
LOl! Guess I’m in the group!!
Cookin' Canuck says
I snorted water through my nose on several of these (I’m a slow learner). This was a really fun post, Irvin. As long as we can make fun of ourselves, then we’re still enjoying this whole food blogging thing, right?
Irvin says
I’m the first in line to make fun of myself! Hope you survived the water through the nose! 😉
Kim Bee says
I was so disappointed I couldn’t attend Blogher as I really wanted to meet you. But this cheered me right up. So funny and so true. Although I’ve never used black garlic. Simply cannot find it here in Canada. I’m determined to find it, try it, then get over it and move on. My family has “photo approval” of any shots they’re in. Pretty bad when it comes to that.
I sure hope one day soon we end up at the same conference. Would be a thrill to meet you and be dorky together.
Irvin says
I believe Amazon.com has black garlic. I loathe to mail order specialty items, but in the case of black garlic, it’s worth it. I love the stuff. I don’t care if the 1/10% of the population that has heard of it is totally over it!
And yes, I hope you make it to a conference sometime soon so we can meet! I love meeting other dorks like myself. 😉
The Cuisinerd says
At first I was sure I would have nothing in common with this list- and then I just couldn’t stop laughing. Guilty, absolutely freaking guilty.
Robyn Stone | Add a Pinch says
Oh good Lordy mercy, I think you’ve been peeping through the curtains! 🙂
Irvin says
I promise I’m not a stalker! 😉
Beth (OMG! Yummy) says
Ok Irvin – I am so cracking up not just about the list but about why you said you wrote the list which is because you didn’t have a food post ready. Which is exactly how Monday usually ends up for me. Which leads me to another point/question – I was going to write a post about a fresh fruit crisp and a change to the topping I usually use and post it today but surprise – I didn’t have time to get it done! So would a crisp qualify for your Pie Day cuz realistically, the post won’t be done until Wednesday (which is usually what happens with my Monday post).
OMG! – in just 2.5 years, I can qualify for almost all of the 40 on the list. Geez.
And did your list include? Your tween-age daughter questions why you are getting into a car with a stranger and you explain that it’s ok because you’ve known them on Twitter for months now. (a true story from BlogHerFood 10)
Irvin says
The sad thing is that I had a REALLY great post lined up for today…and I just didn’t finish it. *sigh* So this went up instead. I’ve been sitting on it for months as my emergency post and it finally came in handy! Now I better find another emergency post to do to have waiting in the wings…
And your last addition is awesome. Though I don’t have a tween-age daughter, I can totally imagine that conversation happening…
Renee says
Love this! I’ve never done #18 but I do own a ridiculous amount of cookbooks, single plates and cloth napkins. Thank you for the big smile!
Willow says
Brilliant! I fall into so many of those categories, it isn’t even funny…
I really loved reading this and am looking forward to checking out the rest of your blog! 🙂
Eating Rules says
Brilliant, as always, Irvin! Having just passed my two-year mark, I can decidedly say that you nailed it perfectly with Nos. 15 & 16.
And here’s another for ya: You’re a food blogger if… You leave comments on other blogs using the name of your blog instead of your real name.
Irvin says
Ha! I actually sign comments at Irvin @ Eat the Love. Which I learned early on from another blogger to do.
And yes. It’s funny the switch from 15 to 16 isn’t it?
Amy Kim says
Spot on, my friend, spot on!
And yes, isn’t normal to have 10 URLs on standby…just in case?
Irvin says
I have too many. And I keep on buying more…
Jun Belen says
Yay for #30! We had our very first egg today from our four-month old hens!!
Irvin says
Super jealous! I want chickens. But I doubt my tiny little backyard would work for them. Nor would my landlord be very happy about it…
Aimee @ Simple Bites says
Full confession: I have chickens.
And that’s the only one I’m admitting too. *wink*
GREAT, great read. I wish I laughed this much every Monday. Thanks!
Kalyn says
Very funny! And I have no chickens, but most of these describe me pretty well.
Ricki says
So adorable! Thanks for the chuckle, Irvin. And so true! (except for the chickens in my case, that is! ). 😉
I do seem to recall you fussing with the plate at our lunch in Carmel, though. . . ! Ha ha! 😀
Irvin says
Oh I always fuss with the plates. Even if I’m not taking pictures of them. I’m OCD that way. 😉
Jean (Lemons and Anchovies) says
Love it! I’m guilty on almost all counts and for the rest, it’s only a matter of time! Would love to have my own chickens and haven’t thought of the multiple URLs.
Thanks for sharing, Irvin. 🙂
Irvin says
What? I’ve lost track of how many URLs I own. I should make a spreadsheet…
Dana Jackson says
Hahaha.. just perfect. Permission to whip this out as validation for my efforts each time my hubby rolls his eyes as he eagerly awaits his opportunity to eat his dinner instead of having it photographed against 3 different textures and light sources?
Thanks!
Jessica | Oh Cake says
I laughed at some of these for sure. I’m less than a year in, but definitely don’t relate to 9, 10, 11, or 15. One of the things I love best about the blogging community is the variety of blog styles out there (despite attempts by some to lump all bloggers into one category). I will add #41. You know exactly what your blogger friends are doing because you tweet, comment, email, read, pin, and otherwise “interact” with them nearly daily; but have no clue what your real life friends are up to.
Irvin says
Oh this was one of those broad sweeping posts and not everyone should relate to every point. But yes, your #41 is so true! I recently found out my real life friend is moving to another city. I had no idea…even though all my other friends seem to know. *sigh*
Aundra | Fit for Life says
Who is over cupcakes?!
Haha this is the best post ever. Great job, man. And for the record, I only have 4 URLs.
Irvin says
Actually, secretly, I’ll tell you that I do like cupcakes. Would I walk blocks and blocks for them? Probably not. But if someone put one in front of me, I’d gobble it up. Don’t tell anyone.
Steve @ the black peppercorn says
ok – I cannot believe how many of these I TOTALLY laughed and nodded at. They are soooo very true. And yes, I have shelves of single plates!
Nicole @ Arctic Garden Studio says
This does not describe me at all because I would never, EVER get down to only one pound of butter!
Irvin says
I get seriously nervous when I am down to one pound of butter. I have real life friends who try to sympathize by saying “Oh I buy my butter in bulk and freeze it…” and I’m all “Freeze it? Why would you do that? I go through so much that it wouldn’t be worth freezing it…”
Tasha - The Clean Eating Mama says
Awesome! Pure genius!
Vijitha says
Oh my god! This is so so so true. I am laughing out so loud. I can see myself do most of the things in the list. And food blogger’s better half always say that food is cooked for the blog and not for them ;-), atleast that’s what my husband complains all the time.
Nicole @ Arctic Garden Studio says
Oh, I get that one all the time.
kellypea says
So true and so hilarious. What about : you have a rack in your garage for the dishes you never use unless you need a food shot. Loved every bit of this.
Irvin says
Love it! If I had a garage, I’d totally store my prop dishes there. As it is, I have them stuffed in bins underneath my counter cabinet. It’s very sad…
kellypea says
Hmm…perhaps there’s another idea for us food blogging types, then. Kitchen design with blog prop storage in mind. Artfully arranged on open shelves, of course, and at the ready!
Prerna@indiansimmer says
You are funny my friend and too honest 🙂
Kristina~Former Chef says
Hilarious. I love this!
It also hits awfully close to home. At least it has at one time or another. I know I’ve mellowed, but the first couple of years…yeah, it’s easy to get sucked into the hype and I’ve been guilty of more of these things than I’d care to admit.
JulieD says
Irvin, this is like gold. Worth so much more than some recap post with a bunch of pictures of said blogger and their friends. 🙂 Seriously, this rings so true, it’s kinda uh scary. And like Kristina said above, I’ve been so guilty!
Irvin says
I just COULDN’T do another blogger conference recap. Just couldn’t. Then I realized I had this post half written in my computer archives and I could repurpose it as my faux recap. Whoo hoo!
Marly says
I am SO #36. Every time I see ugly, old wood dried up somewhere, I’m figuring out how I could get that home and how fun it would be photograph some cookies on it. Great post, Irvin!
PS. Why do I always think of Irving Berlin when I’m on your site? I know it’s the name connection. It’s not a bad thing. It usually means I start humming along with Bing singing Blue Skies. Sigh. Life is good.
Irvin says
Walking down the street yesterday, a huge branch fell off the a tree on the sidewalk. Someone had chopped it up with a chainsaw and wrapped “caution” tape around it. I contemplated taking some of the wood home and storing it as a prop. But then I though better as I live in a tiny one bedroom apartment with no storage and my partner would kill me!
Amanda says
Haha! 12-14 fit me to a TEE!
Melissa | Dash of East says
This may be the best conference recap post ever! Which reminds me, I kept meaning to come introduce myself to you at BlogHer Food and kept forgetting – dang it!
Btw, I am working on the chicken thing (need to convince the hubs still), and totally did #38 while in Seattle (Top Pot!).
Yay for Pie Party!! Just need to figure out what pie to bake tonight 🙂
Irvin says
Oh man. Well introduce yourself to me next time!
And I totally walked to Top Pot too! That’s what inspired me to write that one.
Bree says
I think that I peed in my pants a little! That list is too funny, and way too true.
Amber says
Hee!hee! Great post! Guilty of many of these, especially the cake stands. Have an entire display case for them, which currently cannot hold another cake stand. Unless I move some things around… 😉
Irvin says
I am extremely jealous you have have a display case for your cake stands! I want one. Along with a large apartment that it would fit into… 😉
baker in disguise says
Brilliant..am sharing this on my facebook page!!!
sally cameron says
Great post Irvin! So many of your points made me laugh and smile. Yes, I am guilty of most of them. You were giddy about ramps. I was dying over the fresh morels, garlic spears, and also brought home chocolate pasta, the best smoked salmon Ive ever had and some truffle cheese. Pike Place market was heaven! Austin next year should be great.Thanks again!
Stephanie says
Dammit, Irvin!! I just walked over a mile for a Dynamo Donut. 😉
Irvin says
But wasn’t it worth it? I love me some Dynamo Donuts.
Stephanie says
Oh, here’s one:
You roll your eyes because you post a simple cake recipes and it warrants 7834982734 comments, but when you post a gorgeously crafted savory recipe that took you five tries to perfect, only six people take notice.
Irvin says
RIGHT??!?! Like this post. Look how many comments I got, and this was a total filler post. However most of my posts get about two comments total. *sigh*
Cheryl | Black Girl Chef's Whites says
You know you’re a food blogger if. . .
1. You left a comment on this post confessing which # you are most like.
2. You left a comment on this post about how much you laughed out loud.
3. You left a comment on this post!
I will neither confirm or deny that I, in any way, resemble anything written in this post.
Great job Irvin! Loved this.
Megan says
I so want to own chickens!! I will say I’m not over cupcakes. But I worked at Corn Dog on a Stick in high school, and I never got sick of the “Cheese Bars”. It takes me awhile, if ever, to get sick of something. Thanks for the post! It made me laugh at myself!
Irvin says
OMG. Did you have to wear those awesome Hot Dog on a Stick uniforms with the hat? Because they are awesome. My old design firm worked with them in terms of their branding and design. You can blame them for that outfit.
Megan says
Fortunately, I didn’t have to wear a hat. This was many yrs ago. My shirt was basically see-through because the material was so thin. Good look. haha Good memories!
bakingaddict says
This is a great post and so true – I can identify with more than half of these! I particularly liked #24 – I have received weird looks for this! One was a birthday cake … oops! and #34 it really is not that easy!
Joanne @ Fifteen Spatulas says
This article is absolutely hysterical. My favorites are #27 and #28. I’m bookmarking this so I can have a laugh every once in a while!
Leslie Macchiarella says
You know you’re a food blogger when you drop a roll of Amish butter in the amazon cart for $11 and, when the shipping price comes up as $75, you actually pause for a few thoughtful moments before reluctantly canceling the order. 🙂
Irvin says
Ha! I was totally in Amish country and never had Amish butter. Now, knowing it would cost me $75 to get it, I am regretful.
Caneel says
This is OH so true, Irvin! Thanks for the laugh! (And I’m feeling more than a tad bit guilty after reading the last one because I’ve had to take a little hiatus from my blog until I get some things settled in my life!) Great post. 🙂
Irvin says
Everyone needs a break from their blog! Don’t feel guilty about it at all. Real life should always take priority to virtual life!
Sina says
Seriously, LOL
Melinda Strauss says
Great list, Irvin! But I can honestly admit that I have never made kale chips nor do I plan to write about it on my blog 🙂 You know you’re a food blogger if you actual consider moving across the country to Seattle because Pike Place Market has the most incredible fresh produce. And who doesn’t want handmade slippers made from sheep wool and Washington’s Farm Fresh raspberry honey?!?
Irvin says
Absolutely agreed. Though I am a little biased toward San Francisco and the Ferry Building’s Farmers Market. Seattle is wonderful, but the winters there are killer…
Melinda Strauss says
I’ve never been to SF! Guess it’s time I take a trip. I grew up in Seattle and I always loved winter! You just have to be okay with all the drizzle and cloudy skies.
Lentil Breakdown says
41. You’ve made bacon cupcakes, bacon ice cream and bacon margaritas and are waiting for Serious Eats to tell you when bacon is no longer fashionable.
Thanks for the hoot!
Kimberly says
I have a really random blog, but I totally live more of these statements than I should probably admit to without embarrassment.
I cracked up the first time my five year old declared, “That’s a bloggable moment!”
And my four year old loves to ask, “Are you going to Pin that?”
Oh my!
You’ve got me thinking I should do a food post soon…
Irvin says
Ha! I love that your kids said that. Seriously hilarious.
Kimberly says
They are probably a little warped, but we love ’em!
Re: Chickens–I was making mayonaisse today and needed a room temperature egg. Nooo problem. I just walked out and got one from the nesting box in the barn. It was even still warm. 🙂 Doesn’t everyone do this???
I even had two goats and a cow so I could make more stuff from scratch. They are living elsewhere now, but there were some good parts to it.
eda says
did not consider myself a food blogger until…really enjoyable. thanks for the laugh today!
Brooke @ Food Woolf says
Well this is just brilliant. Add to this “you know you’re a food blogger when” you read someone else’s post and you think, damn! I should have written that!”
Brilliant list. Can’t wait to add to it.
“you know you’re a food blogger when you think that things just won’t be right until you take a class in: latte art, cheese/wine/pie/jelly/pastry making, organic farming, or installing your own raised beds.”
Irvin says
OMG. I so want to take a latte art class! Years ago, I worked at an independent bookstore called Left Bank Books in St. Louis, where I would occasionally fill in over on the coffee shop side as a “barista.” Which meant I learned how to foam milk like no one else. BUT I never learned how to make pretty pictures with the foam. My life is not complete with that knowledge! I must figure out where to take a class now…
Maggie @ A Bitchin' Kitchen says
This is amazing. I love #35! I threw a wedding shower for a friend a couple months ago and had 3 of my cake stands out with quiches (and a cake of course) on display. One of my friends was questioning why I had so many, and she just didn’t understand…
Irvin says
See! Those cake stands totally came in handy in the real world though, not just as props for your blog. Awesome.
charissa (zest bakery) says
guilty x 40. 🙂 great list!
Diana says
This was a great fun post – though I don’t do kale chips – they sucked the moisture out of my mouth – but I did blog about it. I don’t want chickens either – I don’t know how I could go on vacations.
How about – you get excited when a new ingredient shows up in your csa that you don’t think others have posted all over the web (I just tried sea beans).
Irvin says
I LOVE sea beans. I’ve only had them in salad. That’s the best thing about CSAs. They force you to learn about new products!
David Leite says
Irvin, I think peed myself. I really do. Hysterical.
My contribution: You know you’re a food blogger when you develop a recipe you can’t find anywhere on the Internet then decide not to post it because you don’t want to see it everywhere on the Internet.
Irvin says
Why thank you David!
Yep, I have totally saved recipes knowing that I want to keep it all to myself! But now, I’m totally curious as to what you have hidden up your sleeve. I’m sure they are fabulous.
Stephanie says
I’ve just gotten started with this food blogging and can see all of this in my future! Cute article, thanks.
Rich Fletcher says
Hahahaha love that!! Thanks :)) Took me about 4 months before i actually realized , loved #23 and 34, so true!!
Cheryl | Black Girl Chef's Whites says
OK, I actually have a real one to add.
You know you’re a food blogger when you find a cool, new ingredient in the market, pick it up and then proceed to stand in the middle of the aisle for five minutes staring into space as you think of the many posts you could write about the ingredient.
Or maybe that is just me. . .
Irvin says
Nope. Not just you. I’ve totally spaced out at a the farmers market or grocery store staring at the ingredient…and just wondering what I could do with it… Awesome.
Cathy @ ShePaused4Thought says
I am currently cleaning up the floor no thanks to you. I peed my pants when I read your blog.
Simone says
This was juist so hilarious. I’m laughing out loud and it’s not even 7 am in the morning. Brilliant!!
Liren says
You rock. I could just leave it at that, but regarding the chicken thing…you know you’re a food blogger when you start to stalk other people’s chickens. I think I adore Jun Belen’s chickens as much as I adore him!
Irvin says
I adore Jun. I really do. But I think I might adore his chickens more.
Christina @ The Hungry Australian says
So. Freaking. Brilliant.
Sneh | Cook Republic says
Irvin, this is a delightful post. You my friend have solved the mystery of my existence – I am a Food Blogger!! Last year, I wrote a well, kind of similar post about Confessions Of A Food Blogger http://www.cookrepublic.com/journal/38-confessions-of-a-food-blogger-and-foodie/ but you had me cracking up with your hilarious observations!
And I bought another cake stand earlier today .. Eeeep! (No, I am not going to count them lol!!)
Irvin says
I love your post! And yes, I recently bought one more cake stand. But I’m itching to buy a few more… Though I think I’ve run out of room for them now. *sigh*
Girl in a Food Frenzy says
Brilliant words, advice and musings! I think 27. definitely rang true with me! I came across your blog from a big fan at the Blogher conference and am so glad I did.
Irvin says
Welcome! Hope you enjoyed BlogHer Food. I had a blast! If you go again, be sure to track me down and say hi!
Girl in a Food Frenzy says
Sadly I’m in Australia but my blogger pal Karista wrote about you & you blog so I knew I had to check it out! Even better though, now you have two new fans!
FramedCooks says
LOVED this post, and I have done every single thing except for the kake chips! I’m sure this is somewhere in all the wonderful comments but I’ll add it just in case….you know you’re a food blogger when your family eats a lukewarm dinner every night because you have to get just…one…more…shot! 🙂
Irvin says
It actually is NOT which is surprising! That’s a good one.
June g. says
Hilarious! #41…contemplating becoming a food blogger, even after reading these;)
Betty Bake says
hahaha – I LOVED THIS!!! it is so funny and amusing and TRUE!!
you hit the nail on the head 🙂
well written
Betty Bake
Susan in the Boonies says
That was AWESOME! LOL! I didn’t hit EVERY one on your list, but by gosh I hit a whole dang lot of them. Loved it!
Becca from It's Yummilicious says
OMGosh, Irvin… HYSTERICAL TRUTHS! I secretly want to work for Cascadian Farm… just for the organic Oats & Honey granola samples.
However, I am so NOT over cupcakes. What’s not to love about a single serving of yummilicious chocolate cake schmeared with cream cheese frosting and/or the world’s best buttercream? I rest my case! 🙂
Irvin says
I’ll be honest. I love me a good cupcake. Will I walk or wait in line forever for one? Probably not. You know, unless I’m really craving it…;)
Leslie Limon says
You know you’re a food blogger if you can relate to 35 out of 40 of these points. 🙂
Patty says
I was tagged on a link to this on Facebook exactly 2 minutes after taking pictures of rainbow Swiss chard! You nailed this one. 🙂
Tali @ Macnifique says
LOVE this!
Katrina @ In Katrina's Kitchen says
I knew I was a food blogger when I cut into my toddler’s birthday cake for pictures…and patched it up so that nobody would know. And I did this is secret from my husband so that he wouldn’t think I was completely insane for frosting and REfrosting a birthday cake within the same 2 hours.
Irvin says
Hahahaha! I love it. I actually don’t cut into cakes before hand, but I can totally understand the temptation. I love that you refrosted it to cover up your tell tale guilt. Awesome.
cybele pascal says
bwahahahaha! Guilty as charged!
xo
Cybele Pascal
Rachel@ThePescetarianandthePig says
This is pretty funny, however, it does make me question my food blogger credentials… I don’t even own a single cake stand and I have ducks, not chickens! I’m ashamed…. 😉
Irvin says
Ducks totally count. And don’t start with the cake stands. Once you get one, you’ll totally start down the road and get more. It’s a slippery slope…
Renée J. (RJ Flamingo) says
Hilarious! I have to tell you – My husband bought black garlic when he went shopping recently. The cashier asked him what you do with black garlic. His response? “I’ll let my wife figure that out.” 😀 Well, we just used the last of that one and only purchase, literally 10 minutes ago, and are both totally over it. Then I read this and laughed out loud!
Irvin says
I actually LOVE black garlic. I make a vinaigrette salad dressing with it. But it’s funny how people are all “Over. It” when most of my non food friends are completely clueless about it’s existence!
Truly Smitten says
LOL!! Got a really good laugh out of this! The whole time as I was reading down the list, I kept saying, “I TOTALLY SAY THAT!” =)
SunnyB @ andloveittoo says
This list is genius. Thank you for making me quite literally laugh out loud.
xoxo
SunnyB @ andloveittoo says
oh…and you forgot,
You end every comment, post or letter with “xoxo”
😉
Carla @ Carlas Confections says
That is seriously so funny! This post really made me laugh! I am very young in the food blogging, but already a lot of those are true! Fun post 🙂
UnChu Littlefield says
That was fantastic! LOL
Kim @ Coffee Pot Chronicles says
Even as a non food blogger I can relate to so many of these (umm…11 of them. Haha). Although on the one about embarassing stories my husband actually ENCOURAGES me to post the embarassing stuff. He’s the foodie in our household. I have a trace of foodie in me from being around him (yea, I totally scope out the best light when photographing food) but I’m not as into it as he is.
Great post!
Jamie says
We recently watched a series on tv here in France on fashion designers: Gaultier, Rykiel, Lagerfeld, etc. And they go behind scenes before big fashion shows and always interview young models. These models spend five minutes shrieking about the designer, always dreamed of meeting them and oooh now they are wearing their clothes, just going gaga over the particular designer as if that person was a god. I laugh every time and say “good lord, that’s the way food bloggers talk and screech and go all sweaty and pale when they meet a big famous chef!” To each his/her own!
Irvin says
I have met a number of “famous” food bloggers and famous chefs. I have never gotten nervous around them (mostly because I don’t know who they are), until I met my pastry idol Sherry Yard. I totally went fanboy on her and raved about how much I loved her – to her face. She was a total sweetheart and was completely gracious to me. Now we’re BFFs (no, not really but I’m going to pretend that we are…)
tanja @ thegreenmixer says
I’ve only been blogging for a couple of months and I don’t really consider myself a food blogger (yet), but this post assures me that I am getting there…..
thanks for the great post!
Patty says
What if I answered YES I DO to all the items on the list? Am I hopelessly addicted to my blog? I’m scared!
Lot of fun reading your post, I found the link on a FB friend’s page…too funny, too real! Big hugs from Tuscany, Pat
Cristina @ Tiny Perfect Bites says
I laughed out loud at #30. I definitely want chickens!
๓คקเ ☆ says
LOVE IT!!!!!
Anna @ Crunchy Creamy Sweet says
Love it! Especially nr.37 🙂
Hanaa says
I love it. Many of the reasons resonated with me, especially #27 (you can add eggs to that list as well). As for #19, I just ordered Baking with Julia, even though I’ve resorted to having a stack of books *next* to my bookcase. I know, it’s ridiculous! Thanks for posting this list.
bamskitchen says
I am laughing so hard. Everything is very funny but so very true. Great to meet you. BAM
Jonathan says
Guilty…guilty…guilty. And guilty. Funny because it’s SO true. I think there may be almost enough stereotypes to create a new -ism.
Jen says
I’d add to that – you see a food blogger that you “know” and are way too intimidated to say hello because you’re sure they have no idea who the hell you are or that you’ve been stalking them on Twitter!
Marica says
What are RUMPS???
A giddely Marica
Nisha says
On your site first time today, hello.
Came here via a link shared on Facebook.
I can totally imagine how true this is for other food bloggers I know/stalk 😀
I fall into almost none of these in the list, hehe.
Sarah says
🙂 I can relate. Thanks for making me smile!
Brian @ A Thought For Food says
How did I miss this post. Yup! I think I’m a food blogger 🙂
Rita says
Ha!! I snorted all over this piece, and so did Damon over my shoulder.
Thanks for the insight into another world . . .
Allison Day says
HAH! I hardly even blog anymore, and yet still… I’m such a food blogger. I know I’m way late to the party (but I was in Japan, so I have an excuse), but this is cracking me up right now. ^_^
Jen @ Savory Simple says
Number 5 gave me the giggles.
David says
I don’t blog and I easily identify with 75% of your list. What does that make me? 😉
Athena says
this made my night 🙂 (as I am reminded by my husband of dragging him all over Paris to get macs at both Laduree and Pierre Herme recently)…
p.s. I’m pretty sure you don’t remember me but Denise (Chez Us) introduced me to you at the Scharffenberger bakery crawl last fall, right in front of Citizen Cake. Nice meeting you!
Sara @ Real Fun Food says
#6 – Hilarious, because I recently took photos of rainbow chard two weeks in a row. So pretty!!
Jess says
Wow! I just started blogging and I can’t believe how many of these that apply to me. Maybe we are meant to be bloggers!
Chelsea @ One Healthy Munchkin says
Haha I love this! Especially the one about wanting to own chickens. Because I just finished reading Frugavore, which has made me really want to raise my own chickens!
Marina says
Whow….! Now I know that I’m a real bloger…fantastic….!
David says
Obviously that applies to foodbloggers all over the world. I feel familiar with almost every aspect.
Greetings from Germany,
David
Suma says
Hey there! Loved your post, can absolutely relate to what you are say here! You know are a food blogger when you have hundreds of food pictures more than those of your own kids in your computer? I wrote my confessions some time ago 🙂
brighteyedbaker says
I can definitely resonate with some of these; food blogging is really a world of it’s own! I read your post on Google + too and just started an account. Thanks for the advice. 🙂
Alice Choi says
oh my God! this is hilarious and so true! I love #26. f’ing hilarious!
evv says
this made me laugh out loud! i am new to the blogging world, and stumbled upon your post, Food Blogging 101, when looking for help on the internet. your words made so much sense (especially the part about no one will be reading my blog anyway….i knew that but it was nice to know that it isn’t just my blog). then i was curious to know whether i am truly a food blogger so i read this post. haha! some of these actually apply for me! i guess i am on my way. i will be sharing both your posts with my co-bloggers (we are a group blog). thanks for the 101!
Kieran says
Amazing. Love this.
Jenn says
Great post Irvin. I have one to add to the list. You know you’re a food blogger if… “you don’t iron your clothes but you iron linens for food photography.” I did this yesterday and had to laugh at myself lol.
Gagner de l'argent sur internet hq says
hahaaha funny article!!
apprendre la guitare Cours says
Brilliant..am sharing this on my facebook page!!!
Perdre du poids says
AWESOME post, Irvin!
Theo says
Aha, I love point number 5. It reminds me of my parents in the days when they used to grow and make most things themselves. A lot has changed since then but they still try and keep things as natural as possible
Jason says
Very nice post. Love this.
Roy's Farm says
Really very good article. Thanks!
Anuj @prostate enlargement says
Awesome Content.